Like most people, I conjure my deepest thoughts in the shower. Exactly what makes standing naked in a box with water dripping down you a safe haven for deep thinking, I may never know. Nonetheless, I believe my bizarre thoughts should be shared via the internet. Below are a list of questions I ask myself while scrubbing my head with berry scented shampoo. Optimistically, you too ponder over these questions- or I may just appear insane.

People like to kid about digging a hole to another country, but England and France did it. 

The “Channel Tunnel,” also known as the Chunnel, is an underwater train system that runs underneath the English Channel. The channel connects Folkestone, Kent to Calais. Trains can travel up to 99 mph through the tunnel. Imagine telling your mom you are going over to France for the weekend.

To fall asleep, you have to pretend to be asleep.

When you decide to head to bed, you lay there silently, thinking of the day and how you put off cleaning the dishes for the third time. We simply close our eyes and imagine being asleep. Some people lay in bed for an hour before falling into a deep slumber. I, however, usually only lay in bed for five minutes before snoring.

Your stomach thinks all potatoes are mashed. 

After that salty potato chip travels past your taste buds, it decomposes into a mashed mush. If your stomach had emotions, it would be unaware of the vastness of the potato. Only for a second does your digestive system experience the flavor of a french fry or a baked potato.

Hopefully, I am not the only human alive who contemplates these ideas. It would be logical to simply ask Google why things are the way they are but writing my shower reflections for my school newspaper seems more fun. If by chance my readers find this insane, you can find me using my berry scented shampoo in my one knob shower.